SAVA Center - Myths

People have many misconceptions about sexual assault. For instance: "you can't rape the willing;" or "people often cry rape when, in fact, they wanted it to happen;" or "only sexy young women get assaulted;" or "rape is only rape if committed by a stranger." All these examples serve to set the victim up to take the blame for the assault.

The attacker is the only one responsible.

Victim blaming is one of the most damaging responses to sexual violence.

Examples of victim blaming statements are:

"I wouldn't let that happen to me."
"She must have let him do it. Anyone can stop a rape if they want to."
"Sexual assault only happens to bad girls."

What did she expect...?

Being out alone at night?; Drinking more than she should?; Being at that kind of party?; Smoking marijuana?; Living on the streets?; Wearing those clothes?; Going to a bar?; Letting him buy her dinner?; Being married to him and all?; Working at that place?; She got him all excited and led him on. What was he supposed to do?; "But he's such a nice boy. It couldn't be true."; You have to be mentally ill to sexually assault someone.; "If a rapist attacked me, I'd kill him."

It is important to review your own beliefs when assisting someone you know who has been sexually violated. Understand your words have great impact on the victim. Negative outcomes of victim blaming statements can be:

1. Not getting needed help.

2. Not reporting the crime for fear of not being believed

When unreported to law enforcement, perpetrators are not identified to the system and may continue to assault others.